Tag Archives: worry

Hooooooooorah!

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My scan date has come through- I feel so relieved.
And it’s next week which is great news- I’ll be 12+1 by my dates or 12+2 by the date from my cheeky 7 week scan.

And now the next lot of worry starts- results from the nuchal measurements and combined blood tests (Downs Syndrome, MRSA, and many more). Fun stuff…. but at least we can start telling people on a wider scale, providing that all goes well at the scan. (almost)phew!

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Repeating myself…..

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This week has been a little stressful- with the delirium of managing to get through the week coupled with the crippling tiredness of nausea and vomiting, plus managing a whole (ok almost whole) week at work has been very confusing.

Apart from the scary miscarriage poster, I had a small scare about a pregnant friend who had a fall (think she’s ok- I bet she had more of a scare than I did, but you feel so helpless!), still no scan date and the dubious fun of arranging a repeat prescription.

I work in another town (leave home 7am, get home 7pm kind of thing) so I’m unable to fill in repeat prescription form at the surgery during opening hours, or even pick one up and post it another time. My husband also works in another town and is out mostly during the opening hours of my surgery. I’m the kind of numpty who lost the bit of paper with the repeat prescription on from the last lot, so I can’t fill in and post through the dr surgery door.

My drs won’t take over the phone prescription renewals, but they did say on their website that I could do it by email, which I have attempted to do, but there’s no reply from them to confirm that they’ve received and/or processed it.

I had to send my husband back from work early on Friday night to pop in to see if it was ready and give full instructions of what to put on the form if the email hadn’t arrived. Thankfully all was good, save the usual snotty rude receptionist who treated my husband like he’d asked for a blow job rather than to pick up my prescription!

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And what are we doing at the moment? Trying to choose a new kitchen. As that’s not stressful at all!

We’ve been to most the usual cheaper places (Homebase, B&Q, Wickes) and a few of the more expensive (Magnet, Optiplan online) and think we’ve made a decision (ish). There’s so much to think about- layout, units (top and bottom) appliances (which to replace, which to keep), worktops, lighting, sinks, taps, handles, clever corner magic swirly pully-outy-things, discounts….. There’s A Man coming on Monday, and hopefully he will have some good ideas about the planning and dimensions. But I guess with baby on the way, we’ll not have any more money than we do now (having almost recovered from replacing our car just over 2 years ago, the wedding 3 years ago and buying the house 4 years ago)……

But it’s still a lot of money.

And it’s very scary.

"A woman's place is in the kitchen" MKII
(Forgot this picture existed!)

And last of all- I haven’t received my scan date. Now I love mumsnet (hello September thread buddies reading this!), but as my baby is due near the end of the month, most of the people on my thread are 1-3 weeks ahead of me, progress wise. And on top of that, it seems my area has a slightly weird way of doing things. Apparently in Surrey, you don’t get sent your scan date in the post until you’re 12 weeks pregnant, and it’s booked in for week 13. Whereas it’s to my understanding that you usually receive a scan date 1 week after your booking in appt (which we had at 8weeks +5days) for around weeks 11-13 ish. So all my chat-thread-buddies have all either a) had their scan already or b)have a date for a scan.

I feel a bit behind as I’d like to have my scan date- but also because I am now back at work and I am getting very booked up, so I’d like to be able to plan ahead. Husband is also busy and will need to take half a day or so off for the scan!

Offended……

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Oops, maybe I am getting more sensitive. Today I have BEEN OFFENDED.

By an advertising campaign. Ouch.

I’ll tell you why (kinda what this blogging thing is about, right?).

It’s Friday afternoon, and I’ve just survived my first (almost) full week back at work. I feel both wonderful (that it’s Friday and I made it) and awful (so tired and sick), but desperately clawing at the positives and trying my best to ignore the negative. At Reading station, half way home, what do I see?


This is from a charity called The Miscarriage Association.

I understand that pregnancy is not a single path. It’s not what you necessarily want it to be. It’s not necessarily what you plan it to be. It just is. And sometimes it isn’t.

I am fortunate enough to have never been through a miscarriage myself, but I understand the sentiment behind the campaign and I agree that it is important to talk about not only the risk of miscarriage but also the truth about it. I have a number of friends who have sadly experienced miscarriages, from between 6 weeks to 6 months into their pregnancies and I make sure that I have been there to talk about it wherever possible. It’s a terrible and sad experience, and talking about it and normalising it is very important. I’m sure the miscarriage association do a great job supporting people who have been through this kind of tragedy, and it’s no doubt important that they get their name out there, to increase donations and increase their brand awareness. I understand their need to advertise and to remind people to talk about it.

On the other hand, I am trying extremely relax and enjoy my pregnancy (which is easier said than done when you’re nauseous and sick and tired.)

I have this (possibly slightly ridiculous) ideal about being “Earth Mother”– breast feeding, reuseable nappies, healthy home made baby food and generally being calm and zen. And this starts now. Hormones pass across the umbilical cord and placenta into the baby- and this includes the bad feelings of stress and negativity. As a result, despite having every natural worry about the risk of miscarriage or the many other things that can go wrong during a pregnancy, I am being sensible about how I act, but not letting myself get stressed. There is no need for me to fabricate extra worry into my life uneccesarily

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.

Corrie Ten Boom

Statistics are statistics, but the numbers aren’t as clearcut as that.

I grabbed some data from Tommys

Pregnancy history and risk of miscarriage [5]
First pregnancy: 5 percent
Last pregnancy a live birth: 5 percent
All previous pregnancies resulted in live birth: 4 percent
Last pregnancy miscarried: 19 percent
All previous pregnancies miscarriaged: 24 percent

Risk of miscarriage at various ages [6]
Under 30: 10 percent risk of miscarriage
35-40: 20 percent chance of miscarriage
Over 45: 50 percent chance of miscarriage

Repeated miscarriage
• Around one woman in every 100 has recurrent miscarriages. This is roughly three times the incidence expected by chance, suggesting that there may be a specific reason for their losses [7].
• However, for some people, no underlying problem can be found and their miscarriages may be due to chance alone [7].
• When miscarriages remain unexplained, there is still a 75 percent chance that, with the benefit of supportive care, a successful pregnancy can be achieved in the future [8].

5. Regan L, Braude PR, Trembath PL. Influence of past reproductive performance on risk of spontaneous abortion. BMJ 1989;299(6698):541–5.

6. NHS Choices. Miscarriage – Causes. Available at: http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Miscarriage/Pages/Causes.aspx (2012, accessed 25 November 2012).

7. Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists. Couples with recurrent miscarriage: What the RCOG guideline means for you. London: RCOG, 2004. Also available at: http://www.rcog.org.uk/files/rcog-corp/uploaded-files/PICouplesWithRecurrentMiscarriages2004.pdf (2004, accessed 25 November 2012).

8. Clifford K, Rai R and Regan L. Future pregnancy outcome in unexplained recurrent first trimester miscarriage. Human Reproduction (Oxford, England) 1997;12(2):387–9.

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Statistics on miscarriage are based on age, what has happened previously, health and a number of unknown underlying issues and the viability of the pregnancy. Obviously I’m not a medical doctor or any kind of expert in this field, but I do feel like the advertising campaign is misleading, using shock tactics and is a little unfair. Maybe I’m over emotional?

I’m going to get in touch with the Miscarriage Association and signpost them to this post as I think feedback is important.