Monthly Archives: March 2013

Saturday night….

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It’s a saturday night and I’m editing and uploading photographs of my fast-growing middle!

A friend at a party said yesterday (yes I made it to a party!) that she hadn’t realised how big my bump was from photos… but inr ealisty it only really grew this week! I think it’s now emphasized by lovely maternity clothes- two wonderful friends who are a similar height and size to me kindly dropped of two huge bags of gorgeous maternity clothes for my to borrow. Every woman says it but MY GOODNESS these are the comfiest things I have ever owned. I will never wear real clothes again!

Right, there's a smile

Holy Guacamole.

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Scaring me now

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Another blog post to be written from bed……the shame! But to be fair I have actually achieved some things this weekend so all can be forgiven… right?

Saturday we had a lazy start to the day, and watched some telly, skyped some relatives then cracked on with some housework. I think the downstairs now looks presentable to guests. Which is a good thing really as we decided a bit last minute to see if some friends that we hadn’t seen for ages were around (they were) so we invited them over to dinner. We’d already decided to blast some cobwebs away so walked up to sainsburys and back whilst mentally concocting an interesting vegetarian dinner and desert.

Had a lovely evening with friends eating olive bread dipped in cherry balsamic, roasted mediterranean veg with home made harissa paste, couscous and salad, topped off with a home made pear and almond cake (nice one husband).

Sunday we managed to clear up the carnage from saturday night’s cooking experiments, then Husband went for a run and I decided to join him on the bicycle. It was snowing.

When we got back I decided I had the energy to trim the front hedge, but I only managed half before wimping out as I was so cold.

Since then I have gone back to bed to watch a film, and browse the internet.

Today mumsnet has been scaring me with “houserules”- a chat thread in which people discuss the rules of their house. Obviously most of these women or people have children already so it’s understandable they have a few more rules than we do. Most people seem to count wearing shoes in the house a crime, letting pets into bedrooms an utter sin, and NOT EATING AT A TABLE AS A FAMILY the end of humanity. I let the cat have the best bit of the bed (usually about half our king size), wear shoes where I like (I’ll be vacuuming) unless they’re really muddy, and although we eat good home made food, we tend to eat it in front of the telly. Whoops. We’re heathens.

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Who could deny him the best bit of the bed?

What are a sensible list of houserules?

Muchies

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Ooops, today I got the munchies!

After having a bacon and egg sarnie at 11am, about 4pm I realised I was starving. So far I have eaten a free chocolate bar that Moonpig sent me for some reason, three large pickled gherkins (though waitrose disappointed me by ruining them with “dill flower”), a nectarine, a satsuma, and a hot cross bun.

Still starving.

Long time, no update!

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So the world now know my our exciting news! Reactions have been ovrwhelmingly positive, including many offers of second hand babythings and sympathy for the sickness!

Since telling everyone, we had a pretty busy weekend of seeing people, then I back to the grindstone.

Monday was a washout as there were some serious delays on the trains, and I spent a freezing (literally) hour standing (not many seats at my local station) waiting for my train to leave. It had arrived, but refused to open the doors, let us on into the warm and then leave! I had a bit of a fuzzy funny fainty turn to had to call my lovely husband to pick me up and take me home. Not very successful but I hope to be able to claim the full fare back!

The rest of the week has been pretty busy so far, but I did manage to go for a swim on Monday for the first time since getting pregnant! I only had a short time to squeeze it in as the boys were playing squash but I managed half a km without feeling too ill.

I’ve done lots of walking so far today so I hope I’m managing to stay healthy 🙂

14 weeks now, and time is starting to pass at a normalish pace.

Accidental explosion

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Today I accidently ended up getting annoyed at a friend who posted this link to a mummy blog (and this particular post).

If you take it with a pinch of salt, it’s really rather a sweet blog overall, but this post really bothered me (clearly pregnancy hormones kicking in, or maybe I’m just being tired and unreasonable!).

To give you an exert:
How I thought my life as a Mum would be:
7 am awake to the sound of birdsong. Apply minimal makeup to glowing skin whilst a bluebird ties a ribbon in my hair, much like Cinderella. Potter in pristine garden/kitchen with a steaming mug (Cath Kidston) of tea whilst chatting about the day with husband and waiting for cherubs to awake.

8am darling children stir and make their way downstairs for a filling and heathy breakfast: either porridge (organic) or toast with jam (both homemade). Smile fondly at family over kitchen table as we enjoy our first meal of the day together.

(…)

10.30am meet perfect Zara clad friends for coffee. Impeccably behaved toddler sips babyccinos and reads a book. Baby snoozes peacefully in pram. Natter happily about exciting things like school intake and interior design. Stroll home, pointing out leaves, doggies and friendly passers-by to children.

(…)

3pm children simultaneously wake up from nap. Prepare baking activity: Hummingbird Vanilla Cupcakes. Children observe with interest and don’t make any mess. Pop in the oven to eat later with a cup of tea.”

There’s obviously more, but that gives you an idea. I think the reason that this blog bothers me is that it must have been written with a slight pinch of salt for comic effect- haha isn’t it funny how perfect I thought my life would be when I had a couple of smelly, crying babies!

Actually no, it’s not. I get so frustrated when women are depicted as being shallow, stupid and flimsy- it’s the chick-lit version of real life. It doesn’t exist. And what’s worse is when ridiculous representation is made by women themselves. And the absolute crown is when it’s some kind of horrible self-depreciating “aren’t I just a silly little woman” ditty.

No self-respecting woman really thinks that like is all Cath Kidson, coffee with friends and laughing into the breeze. That’s the life that adverts are trying to sell you, not the life that a real person lives. And you can be completely and utterly happy and content in the real world if you stop believing what you’re told is the life you should be living.

Lets take the example of romance. One of the most romantic moments of my life was my wedding night. You probably now think there’s going to be some hideously predictable story of rose, petals, gentle undressing and staring deep into one anothers eyes. Nope- we shared a cheese and pickle sarnie in the jacuzzi bath whilst going “Holy Hell, what was all that about”. And yes, it was beautifully romantic- spending time with the person I love most in the world. Just because it will never be featured on a Lavazza Coffee advert, or a Funkypigeon.com Valentines Day, doesn’t mean it’s any less valid as a wonderful experience.

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Why do women do this to themselves? It’s embarrassing and predictable. We are not all Bridget Jones/Carrie Bradshaw/Rachel from Friends. And most of us don’t want to be.

I might have some flimsy ideas of what parenthood will be, which will no doubt be shattered once baby arrives screaming into the world, but I have the forethought and grounding to realise that my breast-feeding, natural-nappy wearing chilled-out earth mother act might fail at the first hurdle, and I’m not stupid enough to think that I have failed at life if I do.

Women: Get a grip.